The maids are on vacation right now, they left last Dec. 29th. That means more scrubbing, mopping, washing the dishes, and cleaning for me and my mom, but since I don’t want to put too much pressure on her, I take the initiative to do more house work than her. See, I’m a prized daughter and I’ll make an excellent wife. I wouldn’t want to be stuck at home when I already have a family, though.

Yesterday, it was my ex-sort-of-still-current-boyfriend Lucky’s birthday. He’s 26 now and feels old. I asked him if he’s happy with his life, i.e., does he feel accomplished? etc. etc. I already know the answer. That guy has so many fleeting plans for himself, it’s sad. And yes, I tell him this so I think I’m granted permission to write this here. But enough about him. (For those wondering, we really are just friends. He’s in Australia and he works/lives/whatever else there–long-distance relationships aren’t for me.)

I’m dreading Wednesday; it will be the start of classes again. I hate that I’m going to have to study come tomorrow–I’ll have Theo 151 orals on Wednesday afternoon. Happy new year to me indeed!

Today I’d just want to curl up in bed and watch DVDs, play casual games, or just sleep all day. But the maids are still not home (they’re coming back tomorrow afternoon) and so I’ll have to get my ass off any comfortable seat/bed in this house and will have to get to work.

It’s 12NN now and I’m still in bed. Haven’t washed my face yet, or whatever. I’m totally too lazy to do anything. Here’s to yet another busy, uneventful day.

But I’m too lazy.

Right now I’ll just finish my Creme Brulee Zagu.

My nerves are on edge, seriously. I have an OJT interview tomorrow morning at 9AM at the Intelligence Services of the Armed Forces of the Philippines. I owe a lot to my friend, Bupie, who forwarded my application to his boss. This is my first-ever job interview, and I’m totally nervous, it’s crazy. I’m feeling too giddy, too excited, too nervous, too anxious, to even lie still in bed.

On a lighter note, I received today the BEST compliment I’ve heard in my entire life. “Para kang cinarve,” referring to my silhouette. WOO during times like these, I totally appreciate being a curvy girl.

Going back to having my nerves on edge, I am to deliver a speech IN THE MIDDLE OF BELLARMINE F*CKIN’ FIELD (yes, that field right in front of the Church of the Gesu) tomorrow AT 11 FREAKING 30 in the morning. Long story. Probably gonna write about that when it’s over and done with. EEK!

Here’s to a nerve-wracking day tomorrow!

I’ve been meaning to use the gift card Kenny left me before he left. It’s like a gift certificate in the form of a credit card, so yeah, a gift card. It’s valid in all SM Malls’ department stores and supermarkets. So I thought, Heeeeey, why don’t I buy some new sandals, since my two favorite white sandals have already died on me anyway? And when I say “died,” I mean DIED. The soles of one pair grew a hole on them, the other pair’s straps gave up on me and are now beyond repair. I actually forgot that I had that gift card, so I thought of using it today. New sandals! Woohoooo!

Okay so my brother dropped me off at SM Marikina, and I bought a ticket to see It’s Complicated. I like Meryl Streep and I like Alec Baldwin, so it was perfect. I was unofficially having a me-day day, so topping it off with a movie will make it an official me-day day. After buying a ticket, I thought about where I could eat, and then OMG Burger King was right in front me. How could I have forgotten that there was a BK branch in SM Marikina? So I bought a burger meal–LARGE because the movie was gonna be pretty long. I needed a drink that will last me until at least half of the movie, especially since I’m a rootbeer/water guzzler.

I was on the escalator going back up to the cinemas when I realized, OMFG SM cinemas don’t allow food from outside establishments to be brought in their moviehouses. I was having a FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!! moment right then and there because HELLO, I haven’t had BK in a loooong time. And because, HELLO AGAIN, BK is possibly the BEST fast food chain out there only, like, EVER?

And then I had a crazy idea–I’ll stuff my burger + large onion rings + freakishly large drink in my bag! I was scared to do it because one of my favorite books was in there, along with my wallets and cellphone (!!!!). But I was left with no choice. I couldn’t possibly eat EVERYTHING up in a jiff–the movie was starting in 10 minutes! So. There. I had no choice, I stuffed the food in my bag.

Needless to say I was walking pretty awkwardly after that. Knowing that a freakishly large drink was in my bag, I was dead scared of tilting my bag even in the slightest angle. And then the moment of truth came–at the entrance of the Cinema 8, the lady asked if she could check my bag. Without thinking, and willing to face the consequence of possibly getting asked to eat everything in front of the lady, I opened my bag’s zipper. She looked inside. She looked at me. I looked at her. And then she smiled.

I smiled back, as if a burger, a large portion of onion rings, and a freakishly large drink weren’t inside my bag. She just said, “Sige Ma’am, pasok na po kayo, right side po.” I wanted to jump up and down for her being lenient with me.

But my day’s legendary-ness did not end there.

I WAS THE ONLY ONE IN THE MOVIE HOUSE THE WHOLE FREAKING TIME.

I felt special. In my head, I was imagining that entire screening of the movie was dedicated to me and me alone.

Oh, did I mention I bought THREE sandals for only… WAIT FOR IT… P1,000.00. How much of a win is that?

This day = LEGENDARY. (Barney, 2005)

I really don’t know how to draw. Sure, I doodle once in a while, but mostly they look like a 3-year-old kid drew them. Think: stick figures with disproportionate arms and legs. I envy people who, with a few strokes of a pen or pencil (or with their fingernail against the McDo receipt–that thing is cool), could produce drawings that are nice enough to keep in your wallet… Or maybe that’s just me.

The guy in front of me here at the library stood up from his chair, and VOILA I SAW HIS CRACK.

My first thought was that I should put that on Plurk, but I forgot that I already deleted my Plurk account (because I can’t exactly relate anymore to the stuff the people there are talking about). So, no choice, I’ll resort to a “proper” blog post.

Heee, he just stood up again. Hahaha hyukhyuk.

Yes, I’m mature that way.

I love you.

I’ll be waiting.

You can definitely feel love in the air here in school, as I see couples more touchy and clingy than usual. I also witnessed a girl getting serenaded by her boyfriend in the middle of her Spanish class–the whole class, including the prof, was into the whole thing. The boyfriend even brought his own audience with him, a couple of my friends included. (Good job Budoy. )

Last night, I put this in my Facebook status:

This Valentine’s Day, I wish for roses and a short love note. Old-fashioned? Maybe so; I believe in the little things. ♥

I’m not into overwhelmingly huge gestures or tokens of love…

…

Okay, who am I kidding? I DO want that.

With all seriousness, though, I think Valentine’s Day is overrated–while I do appreciate the whole giving of roses and acts of I’ll-shower-you-with-affection-now-more-than-ever, I think what matters is what you do in the rest of the 364 days of the year before the next Valentine’s Day arrives. Sometimes, couples take each other for granted and just end up practically not “connecting,” like they just go about the daily grind each and every day for the rest of the year without apparent regard for their partners. But when Valentine’s Day (or Christmas. Or New Year.) is right around the corner, people automatically become sweeter and more thoughtful towards one another than usual.

Case in point: My parents. It’s only during Valentine’s Day (well, okay, also during their birthdays) that they think of giving one another Hallmark cards not even personalized for the other, or bouquets of flowers. I honestly think it’s kind of sad. Well I guess it’s harder for them to make any effort to actually go out of their way and actually make time for a single night for just them, and nothing else; with their work keeping them preoccupied and all. And I guess that kind of thing comes naturally when you’ve gotten old and you’ve reached that point where gestures of love and a couple of sweet nothings are not needed–it’s understood you both love each other, blahblah, “it’s okay, I’ll give you roses next year,” but one actually forgets.

So I guess, when I can actually afford it–because let’s face it, I honestly don’t want to touch my savings from my allowance everyday; I’m thinking of one day putting them to good use–I promise I won’t forget to give my significant other a special something during Valentine’s Day, or any occasion of the year, or any ordinary day of the year, for that matter. Because, truth is, they might say the material things are insignificant, but I believe it’s those little material things that make you remember special memories that you made with your significant other.

♥

Everything’s falling apart, and there’s no turning back. I’m hoping for better days, but at this point, being too optimistic might mean not getting my point across.

P.S.: Nescafe 3-in-1 coffee sucks ass.

Silent again, we begin to hear
noises in our heads, swelling

to overwhelm the sound of our
breathing. If we are silent for

long enough, something would surface
from under the wind-troubled

faces of murky ponds
our minds have become.

All at once, ripples would flee
in a singular, outward direction-

these questions of guilt or blame.
Then what comes up for air

would be a different quiet
we keep drowning, pinning it

underwater in our pride until
its legs stop kicking.

Different because we may hear
the mirroring of fear and

a time-sharpened dependency
within it. Such a quiet we only

hear when we do not hear:
waking together, every meal,

sharing the same cab home.
Listen. Listen. My hand swims

into the bay area of your hand.
If we are silent for long enough,

we could start over.

Cyril Wong